chivalry, the myth

I'll be honest, I have high expectations of the general public and it sets me up for failure and disappointment again and again.  I should lower them but I can't ever seem to get around to it.  So what happens?  I'm bummed out over and over again about things like horrific customer service and ridiculous drivers.

The other day I was faced with these expectations and they slapped me in the face.  Hard.

I was driving to meet the lovely women of my writing group and because I was coming straight from work I was hungry, not to mention low on cash flow.  McDonald's drive thru it is.

I order my small fries and hamburger, pay and pull up to wait for my turn at the little magic window that produces your food when It happened.

I get rear ended.  Not a full blow to the bumper but a hit to be sure.

I look in my rear view mirror, aghast, and throw my hands up in the traditional "what the hell?" gesture and the guy has the nerve to look back at me like he doesn't know what my problem is.  What's a girl to do?

I get out of the car.  That's right.  I get out to see if there is any damage to The Emperor.

I go to the back of my car and I'm not joking, the guy was still right up against my bumper.  I ask him to move back and his response is, "I can't, there's a car behind me."  I laugh in shock and say "I promise you it's not nearly as close to your car as you are to mine."  His response?

"You could move forward."

Just soak that in for a second and search for your favorite, derogatory word to describe this guy while I continue.

"You hit me!", I say.  "There is plenty of room for you to move back, just please do it so I can see if there is any damage.  I'm sure it's fine, just please do it."  Now, I'm reassuring him?  What a load of total crap this is.

He rolls his eyes and very begrudgingly does it.  He moves back about 6 inches [amazingly, he didn't hit the person behind him!  It's a miracle!] to reveal that there was no damage, thank the Lord.

I say in a tone reserved for a petulant child, "See, everything's fine.  It didn't have to be a big deal." and I get in my car.

I don't know why this kind of behavior surprises me but it does.  Chivalry is something we're told existed a long time ago when there were Knights and Ladies and round tables and such.  But sometimes, we're told today that "chivalry isn't dead."

Really?  Are you sure?

Did feminism kill chivalry?

Did equal rights take chivalry and kick it in the balls?

Is it that perhaps, as women, we really do want it all?  And we should have it.  It's not just the glass ceiling we want removed, we want the guys walking to it before us to hold it open while we walk through it.

We do want you do walk on the outside part of the sidewalk, closer to the street so we don't get splashed.  We do want you to pay the check and pull over to help us if our tire blows out on the highway.  And, God forbid, we also want you to be sorry and accommodating when you rear end someone in the drive thru -- or anywhere else for that matter.

It doesn't seem to happen as much anymore.  I know there are a few lone soldiers out there trying to fight the good chivalry fight and I thank you. It's not unnoticed that you pay attention to the details and I hope you continue to do so.

Everyone else:  please step it up.  I think we deserve it.