ring spotting

I'm not exactly sure when I learned to do this automatically but I'm guessing it was around the absurd age of 20. 

When I see a cute guy I IMMEDIATELY glance to his left hand.  I'll wiggle in my seat a little to get a better look. I'll squint my terrible near-sighted eyes to focus better on the guitar-playing hand shaded by bright stage lights.  I'll casually, but swiftly, look down when he's not looking.

All to see if he's wearing the tell-tale wedding ring.

Frankly, it's completely ridiculous that I knew there was a need to do this as early as 20.  It's not like I was scoping older men, looking for my sugar-daddy [that would come later] it's just that in my city that's when people get married.  I don't even live in the South where it's OK to marry when you're 15 [and sometimes your cousin, for that matter] it's just what people do.  And not just some people, most people.

This past weekend I was in the great city of New York.  I walked over miles of sidewalk and rode miles of subway.  I ate in amazing restaurants and was happy to pay the price of an upset stomach for lots and lots of great cheese.  I saw a two-man play about the complexities of homosexual male relationships [I could relate to their frustrations with men].  I saw a Broadway show for 50% off.  I accidentally happened upon Occupy Wall St when I came out of the subway station.  I was told by a seemingly well-trained and sophisticated salesman at Hugo Boss that I was "between a small & a medium".  [Needless to say, he lost that sale.]  I saw people from every country in the world and I heard nearly every major language there is to speak, but you know what I hardly ever saw?

Wedding rings on cute guys.

It was shocking really.  I would look down with pessimistic anticipation and to my surprise, no ring!

This happened so often, I thought about adopting a "no glance" policy but that seemed totally crazy so I gave that up. 

So, thank you, men of New York City.  Thank you for being my age and not married.  Thank you for your pin stripe suits and your ubiquitous iphones.  But most of all, thank you for being single.